So, my husband suggested I start blogging. This of course is something people have been doing for years now & I have NEVER done. I used to keep a journal & quit a year to two ago. Not sure why. Maybe I found my thoughts to be insignificant & thought to myself, "why do I need to remind myself how weird I am & have those weird thoughts stare at me on white lined paper".
Anyhoo, today is my first day of blogging. The thing that is consuming my thoughts is I'm turning 34 this month. To most this is not a big deal. You have either past this age or think you are far from it. Believe me, I thought I was far from it as well. I feel like I have been reading my life in a book...a very boring book... and have turned to page 34 & it's blank. Not sure if that is a good or bad thing. God has given me a loving, caring husband. My family & my husband's family are wonderful & supportive of our lives. But we have not had children yet. This lack of procreation has somehow defined my life up to this point. I have loved my God, Jesus, my husband, my family & many many friends. Yet, I feel like a part of me has yet to be written. Maybe will never be written/lived. This is not meant to be depressing. Although, I have been there-done that! These are just my thoughts.
With all this said, I still believe in Jesus & love him with all my heart. I do question him as to why not me? But his word, which i do believe is true, says that he hears my prayers & will never leave my side. Some days it really doesn't matter that there are no little Stephen's or Meloney's running around our house. Then there are other days, when my heart aches desperately for that opportunity. The opportunity to be a mom. Those who have children...if you are reading this. Be thankful for your children. Love them. Don't be too hard on them. They are a treasure.
That's all for today. Love to you all.
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